Think about a vacation. In the weeks leading up to it, we’re full of excitement – planning, packing, imagining all the fun we’ll have. Anticipation feels amazing.

Then we’re there, living the experience. Sometimes it’s wonderful. Sometimes it’s stressful or not exactly what we imagined. And afterwards, instead of remembering all the fun we had, we often focus on what went wrong—what we could have done better, the moments we missed, the things that didn’t go as planned.

Psychologists call this the focusing illusion: we overvalue potential and anticipation while underestimating the value of effort, experience, and completion. We fail to appreciate the journey as it happened.

Shlomo Hamelech (King Solomon) captures this in Koheles (Ecclesiastes 7:1): “A good name is better than fine oil, and the day of death is better than the day of birth.” At birth, we celebrate potential. At death, we mourn unfulfilled possibilities. But the Midrash explains a deeper truth: only when a person has completed life’s journey can we truly appreciate the deeds and character they built.

The Midrash compares this to ships leaving and returning to port. People cheer when a ship sets out, excited for its voyage, but often show little appreciation when it returns safely. A wise person points out the mistake: the real cause for celebration is the safe return, after surviving storms, waves, and dangers.

The lesson is clear: we often misplace our excitement. True accomplishment isn’t in the beginning or in potential—it’s in what has been achieved, after navigating the challenges along the way. The next time you finish a project, reach a milestone, or reflect on your journey, pause and appreciate how far you’ve come.